Thursday, November 1, 2012

Republican to English Translations

By Dale Bowling

With all the rhetoric these days, it strikes me that a translation of Republican into plain English would be useful. These are in no particular order.

Republican: "There are 47 percent of the people who will vote for the president no matter what. All right, there are 47 percent who are with him, who are dependent upon government, who believe that they are victims, who believe the government has a responsibility to care for them, who believe that they are entitled to health care, to food, to housing, to you-name-it. ... My job is not to worry about those people. I'll never convince them they should take personal responsibility and care for their lives." -Mitt Romney, in leaked comments from a fundraiser in May 2012

Translation: "Poor people deserve what they got and I have no obligation to them."

Republican: "Corporations are people, my friend..." Mitt Romney

Translation: "Corporations have more rights than you do, my friend"

Republican: "We're not going to let our campaign be dictated by fact checkers," - Romney pollster Neil Newhouse.

Translation: "We're going to lie a lot and there's nothing anyone can do about it."

Republican: "I hope he fails." - Rush Limbaugh when asked for his hope for the Obama Presidency just before Obama's inauguration.

Translation: "I would prefer to see the lives of innocent Americans ruined than have my political opponents succeed."

Republican: "Let Detroit Go Bankrupt" - Mitt Romney arguing against a government bailout of the Auto industry.

Translation"Let Detroit Go Bankrupt"

Republican: "“Well, I think you hit a reset button for the fall campaign. Everything changes. It’s almost like an Etch-A-Sketch. You can kind of shake it up and restart all of over again.” - Romney advisor Eric Fehrnstrom on his campaign.

Translation: "We don't actually stand for anything."

Republican: "I should tell my story. I'm also unemployed" - Mitt Romney

Translation: "I have no idea what you're going through."

Republican: "The single most important thing we want to achieve is for President Obama to be a one-term president." - Mitch McConnell, Senate Minority Leader.

Translation: "See above,"I hope he fails".

Republican: "My view is that we don't know what's causing climate change on this planet. And the idea of spending trillions and trillions of dollars to try to reduce CO2 emissions is not the right course for us." - Mitt Romney

Translation: "Superstorm Sandy, You're on!"

Republican: "The feminist agenda is not about equal rights for women. It is about a socialist, anti-family political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism, and become lesbians." - Pat Robertson

Translation: "I'm not taking my medication."

And an oldie, but a goodie...

Republican: "I'm not worried about the Deficit. It's big enough to take care of itself"- Ronald Reagan who btw tripled the Deficit.

Translation: "I poke fun at the fact I'm leaving America with a terrible problem that will haunt your children's children."

Me: These people are mean-spirited lunatics who happily run our country off a cliff for short-term personal or political gain.

Translation: VOTE DEMOCRAT on NOV. 6

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